How To Not Strangle Your Coworkers: Resolving Conflict with Collaboration
summary
Defines conflict (importance, interdependence, perceived evidence) and breaks it into task, process, relationship; argues teams need psychological safety (Amy Edmondson) and gives concrete tactics: demonstrate situational humility, ask elaboration questions, express appreciation, use hedging, agreement, acknowledgement, reframing in conversations, and pause 24 hours before replying to charged PR comments. Contrasts Model 1 (win/zero‑sum, creates self‑sealing processes) with Model 2 (seek win‑win), and recommends uncovering goals vs positions (e.g., swap 100% unit tests for a defensible 70%).
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chapters (9)
- 0:00Welcome
- 3:54Conflict types in teams
- 8:26Psychological safety
- 14:44Building safety
- 26:35Emotions in conflict
- 33:16Model one vs two
- 41:19Confrontational styles
- 45:07Handling conflict as an individual contributor
- 53:35Summary
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